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MEMO

TO: Grandmas, papas, aunties, uncles, friends, friends of our children, various others who may have a desire to purchase our children any toys whatsoever

FROM: The Schmidt Parents

CC: Santa

DATE: November 4, 2007

RE: Schmidt children toy moratorium

We truly do appreciate your past generosity to our offspring, AE and JG, however we - the parental units - simply cannot deal with any more Legos, game pieces, Littlest Pet Shops and movies at this time.

While the Schmidt children were away today their parents decided to take it upon themselves to "organize" the mess under the stairs since we have fully acknowledged that our children do not understand that cleaning up their toys does not mean building a 2 x 3 foot pile of crap in the toy closet.

After 3 hours we managed the separation of 985 both big and small Lego pieces, location of 349 Thomas the Tank Engine rails and engines and the location $5,498,387 in Life money (do I need to mention how bloody hard it is to find those little people in the carpet?), we decided that we can take no more.

So until our minor children take responsibility for the cleaning up of their belongings after playdates we will have no more additions to our already full household.

Again, we do thank you for your generous past contributions and will let you know if Santa will be allowed to "stop by" this season.

Comments

carey said…
rock on. can i have a copy of your letter for my family and mr. claus??
Karen said…
Does that work? Can you just say, "Sorry, kids, Santa's not coming," and leave it at that? Man, wouldn't that be great???
K~ said…
Oh dear. I can relate! I wish our mess was under a staircase or in a closet, however. Our mess is our house. We (I) refer to them as crapolanches! Congrats on a very nicely written letter and good luck! K~

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